The saddest girl in the world

Today I met the
Saddest Girl in The
World,

Her eyes were clear
Like diamonds of
Ice.

Teeth more white
than mother pearls.

She said she once
Prayed out to God's,
(even wished upon
bright stars.)
but learned in time
that all were Frauds!
(And soon found meaning
In Her Scars.)

I've thought of her
a lot tonight,
(torn between Hope
And my usual
Despair.)
Considering True
Love at First Sight!
(And how her wounds
I might repair.)

Perhaps Two Broken
can be Whole,
if both (within) lack
something different?

And a Simple Kiss
could mend the Soul!
Or ease (a while )
Ones Lonely Torment?

Ill likely dream a lot
Tonight,
about the Saddest
Girl in The World..

Her clear blue eye
filled up with light..

Who smiles!!

(With Spirit White
Like Mother
Pearl.)

J.s.h.

Cut open by her smile

Cut open by her smile.
++++++13+++++++

Cut open by her
smile,..
So many nights
wasted,...
spent in denial,...
pursuing
loves sweet fruit.

(so often bitter once
it's tasted.)

And where has it
led?

This haunted house
Of Broken MiRRorS,
filled with Voices
Of The Dead!

(Who thrive on pain,
and tears.)

A black tie

A black tie affair.
++++++13++++++

She learned (pretty early in life)
that love was not a black tie affair,
but a beautiful struggle between
Joy and Strife.

It Sometimes tames the Savage
Soul. (Or cuts it like a jagged knife.)

And She's had her share of romantic
Teachers.

A few brief flings,..with a lot of regrets.
( even some awkward would-
Be preachers.)

But...(most ironically) everything
She learned about what NOT to do?

(She learned from me.)

J.s.h.

Paper tragedies

Paper Tragedies.
+++++13+++++

It was cold the
Day you said goodbye,
And frozen are
The tears my love.
(which stab my weeping
Eyes.)

I tried being strong,
because I thought
it's what you needed,
but here now in my
Solitude I see that
I was wrong.
(And by your silence
am defeated.)

It's cold here without
You Beauty,..
and the days are Paper
Tragedies I tear to
Mortal Shreds!
(wishing in my hopeless
Heart the angels
would bring you back
to me.)

J.Stephen.H.

A soul that watches still

A soul that watches still.
++++++13+++++++

Oh brother oh brother,
Where have you gone?
Is the flesh a clever cover,
For a soul which rages
Like the dawn?

Do you think of us from
A land of dreams,
Blessed by 7 Sacred Sun's?
Where Angels Laugh
Behind The Scenes!
(And play God's Splendid
Drums.)

Where did that happy
Child go,
Whom I remember still
So well?
Why did he become A
Man of Sorrow?
(Who thought His Life
Was Hell.)

I Hope you've found a
Better Place,
Where all are sacred
Friends,
Where No sad tears shall stain
Your face ,
And laughter doesn't end.

Brother..oh brother..
Was your death an act
Of Will?...
And is the flesh a clever
Cover?

(For A Soul that watches
Still?)

J.s.h.

In memory of Donovan melson.
Oct. 9 1986-Sept. 8 2013.
R.I.p.

(I'm still pissed off at you
Man, and you broke my fucking
Heart..but ...I understand now.)

Ranting

My three month stint
As a self exiled street
Urchin wandering the
Streets begging the gods
For better muses was
Not so fruitful as I had
Hoped...
But, when you start
With nothing and end
The same what do you
Have to lose?...
But a bit more of the
Mind you try your damdest
To drink away because
The romanticized illusions
You prefer no longer exist
Outside of the countless
Books you read growing up
On nevermore farm ...
Where hugs for breakfast
And fists for desert created
This...very odd little twerp
Of a thing fascinated with
Characters...

I wish I could be everyone
Sometimes..
Every good, bad, pretty, ugly,
Normal, fucked up bastard
of a wellbred person,
But I can't even be myselves
Haha-!

If my life were a novel
It would end in a Steinbeck
Cliffhanger with me crashing
Madly in the waves looking
For my poor lost heirloom
I should've passed on..
But my stormy heart  knows
Only the winter of discontent
To the exclusion of any of
Season...
And..is there a reason?
Cause and effect explain
How's but the why that
Eludes me keeps me here..
Searching..
Modifying my
...character.

(Since I fear to
Be the author of
My ending.)

The Great Necessity of beasts

Your face is
The kind that
Eats the heart
In dreams,
Yet..you know
Little of duality..or
The Great Necessity
Of beasts ..(and
How they feed
An Angels pious
Tendencies.)

There are no
Sides..there never
Were..

Love, and hate,
Life and death,
Good and evil..
all are timeeless
Archetypes revolving
Around an infinite
Center.

(And you will
Always be the
blind Maelstrom
eating
My heart in
Dreams.)

A house of MiRRorS Without doors

I've been here
Before,
Caught in a
Loop,
In This house of
MiRRorS Without
Doors,
where everyone
Stoops because
they cannot Stand
For Their Own
Truth,
Or justify what
Life is for.

Running from love
Since none of
My identities are
Worthy,
And...
There's never
Been a genuine
Me.

You see..
I Am the MiRRorS
My sweet...
Reflecting nothing..
(And the voices
Ask me why I drink!)
Hating..
Because pain is
The price we
Pay for loving.
And ..
I've always been
Broken.

Fuck it
Never mind....

Thanatopian

Lo, I've never known
A moment's peace,
Or noticed beauty
In a rose,

For life's cruel
Garden grows
Disease.

(And flowers
Grown by
Thanatos.)

Yet other mortals
(Here on earth)
seem to shout out
Thanks and praise,
For ever hour since
Their Birth.

(Which I've lamented
All my days.)

The man in the mirror

The man in the mirror.
+++++++13+++++++

The man in the
Mirror grows restless,..
(Hollow eyes seeking
Something to Consume.)
and to himself
Confesses, that he
Craves this State of
Gloom.

"But may the darkness
Of My Soul create
A Light.."
(He whispers.)
"and get me through
another night,
in the Presence of
These Shadow
Listeners!"
(who feast upon
Grim Thoughts
Like Parasites.)


There is Something
In Him Truly Broken.
Not his Heart,
But something worse.
Something Vast, and
Left Unspoken!
(Something Wicked
Like A Curse.)

Morning is here, yet
He Does Not Tire.
Watching the weeping
Man In The Mirror,
and the fiery tears
His eyes perspire.
(To the point cold
Cheeks Grow Blisters.)

"Oh!..
(He screams)
May loves voice
Defeat the whispers
Of these wretched,
Midnight Shadow
Listeners!!!!!!!!!!

(Before they eat my
Dreams.)

J.Stephen.H.